I would say too, often, hear the phrase do not I can in the mouth of my clients, friends, neighbours, in the end, that almost everyone has not I can easy. No wonder: we are born and we develop immersed in a culture that limits us. Education provided us our parents at home, the teachings received at school, and even the media that we see or hear we have been transmitting a series of limiting beliefs that have been etched into our self more deep. On the other hand, say don’t want to on many occasions is frowned upon, since it refers to egoism and the latter has bad press. However the selfishness, well understood, is healthy and necessary to develop and grow freely. Speaking candidly christopher ridgeway stone told us the story.
A third reason to say can’t, instead of I don’t want to, is that thus disclaim the responsibility associated with a decision. It is easier to declare unable to face the judgment of others, although it is clear that the price that is paid for that reason is usually high: The consequences more frequent are frustration, lack of action, stagnation, etc. Will not say that he does not I does not exist, there are situations where even though we call all our resources are unable to resolve, and that’s fine, we are human, not Super Heroes, without however, I propose that every time that you enfrenteis a difficult situation you do the following questions: resolve this situation depends on me and my actions? I have the resources to deal with it? If the answer to these two questions is Yes, now there is no one I can answer. Then continues: do I am willing / a to do something about it? What would I like to this? what I lose if I decide to say and what win do not want? Perhaps it is time to say ever: I can, but I don’t want to! Original author and source of the article